The most annoying type of bad listener
"I didn't know you had diabetes," said my friend. "Tell me about it."
"In a word, its type 2."
"What's Type 2?" she asked, clearly curious to know more.
"Type 2 is when you are insulin resistant which means..." And I began the explanation.
Less than a minute into it, she turned around, pointed to her annoying little cat, and said, "look how she just stretched, isn't she just the cutest?" So I turned my attention to the distraction and commented politely on it. Then I awkwardly returned to the explanation from which I was so obnoxiously cut off?
But a further minute into it, she distracted me again. "Oh what's that noise?" she said. Again I did the polite thing and helped her seek out the mysterious noise coming from outside, which turned out to be neighbors chatting in the street. Now I was certain that my conversation bored the girl so I did not return to it. Like most people, I don't wish to be boring, so will take the hint. But what do you do, when someone perpetually asks you questions, then consistently ignores and interrupts your answers? Not once, but every single time?! “Look at my dog.” “What's that noise?” “I think I know that couple at the next table.” “That guy has a mosquito on his back, flick it for him.” I'm sorry, I don't care if the guy at the next table is about to be swallowed whole by a mutant Venus Fly Trap, if you break eye contact with me to save him from imminent death, then you are indicating that I do not have your undivided attention. The way I was raised, that's as rude as being slapped in the face.
One thing for certain is that it’s a complete waste of time to entertain a conversation with such persons whilst driving a car!!"Look at those cows.” “Check out that cool van.” “Did you see that tree?” “Oh my God, that cloud looks like Santa Claus." If they even try to engage you in conversation, my advice is to feign car sickness, sleep or preferably death.
The funniest was when I found myself in a restaurant with one such bad listener and, deeply absorbed in telling me all about her vacation, she sent away the waitress, asking her to return only once the story was over. I wished this girl would show me even one tenth of the regard that she showed herself.
So what are we to do in such situations? My cowardly way to handle it has been to allow myself to be constantly sidetracked, and accept that I will never finish a sentence. Perhaps I’d be better off asking these self absorbed individuals to stop interrupting. Maybe I ought to ask whether I am boring them. Or even suggest to them that they are rude and uneducated.
But people don’t like being told off, it simply elicits a knee-jerk reaction of self justification, and before you know it, you're the bad guy. Perhaps there is no effective way to let someone know that their behavior is rude and offensive, and your only choices may be to suck it up or walk away.
"I didn't know you had diabetes," said my friend. "Tell me about it."
"In a word, its type 2."
"What's Type 2?" she asked, clearly curious to know more.
"Type 2 is when you are insulin resistant which means..." And I began the explanation.
Less than a minute into it, she turned around, pointed to her annoying little cat, and said, "look how she just stretched, isn't she just the cutest?" So I turned my attention to the distraction and commented politely on it. Then I awkwardly returned to the explanation from which I was so obnoxiously cut off?
But a further minute into it, she distracted me again. "Oh what's that noise?" she said. Again I did the polite thing and helped her seek out the mysterious noise coming from outside, which turned out to be neighbors chatting in the street. Now I was certain that my conversation bored the girl so I did not return to it. Like most people, I don't wish to be boring, so will take the hint. But what do you do, when someone perpetually asks you questions, then consistently ignores and interrupts your answers? Not once, but every single time?! “Look at my dog.” “What's that noise?” “I think I know that couple at the next table.” “That guy has a mosquito on his back, flick it for him.” I'm sorry, I don't care if the guy at the next table is about to be swallowed whole by a mutant Venus Fly Trap, if you break eye contact with me to save him from imminent death, then you are indicating that I do not have your undivided attention. The way I was raised, that's as rude as being slapped in the face.
One thing for certain is that it’s a complete waste of time to entertain a conversation with such persons whilst driving a car!!"Look at those cows.” “Check out that cool van.” “Did you see that tree?” “Oh my God, that cloud looks like Santa Claus." If they even try to engage you in conversation, my advice is to feign car sickness, sleep or preferably death.
The funniest was when I found myself in a restaurant with one such bad listener and, deeply absorbed in telling me all about her vacation, she sent away the waitress, asking her to return only once the story was over. I wished this girl would show me even one tenth of the regard that she showed herself.
So what are we to do in such situations? My cowardly way to handle it has been to allow myself to be constantly sidetracked, and accept that I will never finish a sentence. Perhaps I’d be better off asking these self absorbed individuals to stop interrupting. Maybe I ought to ask whether I am boring them. Or even suggest to them that they are rude and uneducated.
But people don’t like being told off, it simply elicits a knee-jerk reaction of self justification, and before you know it, you're the bad guy. Perhaps there is no effective way to let someone know that their behavior is rude and offensive, and your only choices may be to suck it up or walk away.
Why do you ask me questions,
if you don't care about my answers?
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